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Right. This is the thread for the big top-of-the-table derby. v . v . .

There may be swearing. No. There will be swearing.

Already we have a pre-match controversy: do I need a wee or will it wait while half-time?

He's us striker
He's us number 9
Scooring goyls int blue n white
Gorrim on a free from Stoork Citee
And he guz bih name uh Gregory!

2-1

Well, what an odd first half.

Barnsley were tigerish in the press, as you'd expect in their cup final, but Wednesday dominant and threatening more and more as the half wore on.

A good goal from , and only a proper world-class save from the Dingle goalkeeper stops making it two for the with a header.

(Oh, and we let them score two (good) goals within LITERALLY 13 seconds of each other.)

And my bladder held out too - this must omen well.

HT 2-1

REVERSE BUGGAR AND REVERSE BOLLOCKS!

Bannan to Neymarv to Gregory! BISH BASH BOSH!

2-2

Reinstate both buggar and bollocks, add in a piss and a tits.

Wednesday could and should have strolled that. But Barnsley deserved the win - if you give the oppostion easy opportunities to score 3 goals, you can't complain when they take them. (And they took them well.)

Brilliant game of , better than anything you'll've seen in the blood-money-billionaire leagues this year.

Stick your up your bollocks. Gimme a local derby in the rain any day.

4-2

Azul Buho

I think I am reasonably magnanimous in the face of defeat by the Dingles because I was wholly expecting it. Their cup final, us unbeaten for 23 games, not lost there for donkey's years, etc.

But I absolutely did not expect to lose like that. I was expecting a dud performance, rathering than us battering them and (deservedly) losing anyway.

And I can't even drink heavily in response, for I have a hospital appointment in the morning. Ho hum. We go again.

4-2